Gaem Torents!?

Lutenent Worf

Turbine makes some outstanding games. The Lord of the Rings Online has been my main MMO for the past 5 years or so, and Dungeons & Dragons Online is pretty decent too. Both games offer exceptional value – free-to-play with a cash store, and you can earn the currency needed for the cash store through gameplay, allowing you to unlock F2P restrictions. Basically, they set the model for how to make a good F2P title, which other companies have followed. I like their producers, who are always friendly in Skype conversations when they do their PR blasts for new updates and expansions. Turbine is a great game company.

BUT! My one gripe with the company is that they use Pando Media Blaster as the download client for their games. I hate Pando Media Blaster. I find it buggy and demanding, like a B-list celebrity throwing a tantrum in a restaurant or something, demanding ALL the attention and creating such a commotion that if one thing goes wrong, the whole system shuts down and has to be restarted. I’m on wireless internet, which can be intermittent during periods of lousy weather, and occasionally my connection sputters. PMB hogs every spare bit of bandwidth, so I can’t even really use the Internet while downloading a game, and when my connection sputters out because of fog or wind or whatever, PMB freezes dead, generates errors and can’t be shut down properly, and won’t resume the download when the connection is re-established. I have to restart the computer to make it work again.

Anyway, my buddy Kevbob started playing Star Trek Online, and I figured I’d check it out. It’s made by Perfect World Entertainment, a company I’ve been having good luck with over the past year. Their games have generally been solid and enjoyable. I did reviews for Torchlight II and RaiderZ and gave them both fairly high marks, and they are coming out with Neverwinter sometime this spring, which is also looking really good. So yeah… I go to the STO page, click on the Download link… and they have options. Apparently, you can get the game through Steam (which I don’t really like for a number of reasons), any of a number of file-hosting sites, or my personal favorite method: torrent.

Why don’t more game companies offer this choice? I hate 3rd party downloaders. Torrents are easy, they don’t break and bug out, you don’t have to lawyer up with needless legal disclaimers ducking responsibility for the use of another company’s crappy product… it’s all-around win.

Advertisements

Ammazing Spi-Derp-Man!?

Gosh, where to begin…

Noep. Didint liek it.

Noep. Didint liek it.

Ok, first I’ll go over the positives. Points for casting Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy. She’s cute and fun. Another point for the mechanical web-shooters instead of the bogus spinneret patches on the wrist. Spiders don’t shoot web from their wrists, and if Peter Parker was to develop a mutant biological analogue of a spinneret, it would more likely be on his ass. The Stan Lee cameo is fairly well-timed and funny. I kinda wonder what those massive 80’s-style headphones are plugged into when he walks away.

That’s it for the good parts. Onto the criticisms. Continue reading

Sum Frendly Unsolisited Advise

Forg.

Forg.

I’ve received this same exact comment spam several times, each time from a different sender. It’s always caught by my spam filter. I’m sure there are many other WordPress users getting the same nonsense and rightfully deleting it without ever reading it. However, I gave it a read-through and decided it would be fun to share and dissect this free unsolicited advice.

Hello Web Admin, I noticed that your On-Page SEO is is missing a few factors, for one you do not use all three H tags in your post, also I notice that you are not using bold or italics properly in your SEO optimization.

Hello, Asshole Comment Spammer, I noticed that you lack basic grammar skills and have never bothered to read anything on this site. Otherwise you would know that SEO is entirely unimportant to me. Also, “SEO optimization” equals “Search Engine Optimization Optimization.”

On-Page SEO means more now than ever since the new Google update: Panda. No longer are backlinks and simply pinging or sending out a RSS feed the key to getting Google PageRank or Alexa Rankings, You now NEED On-Page SEO.

You are mistaken. If I was interested in drawing traffic to this site, I wouldn’t be using a free service and I would be writing about things that people other than myself care about. Furthermore, I think you need to re-tool your audience targeting tactics. If you’re trying to sell your service to people who already know about backlinks, pinging, RSS feeds, PageRank and Alexa Rankings, they likely already know all about SEO anyway. If you are targeting newer users who don’t already know about these things, your use of what is essentially “jargon” will only confuse them. Do some research.

So what is good On-Page SEO?First your keyword must appear in the title.Then it must appear in the URL.You have to optimize your keyword and make sure that it has a nice keyword density of 3-5% in your article with relevant LSI (Latent Semantic Indexing). Then you should spread all H1,H2,H3 tags in your article.Your Keyword should appear in your first paragraph and in the last sentence of the page. You should have relevant usage of Bold and italics of your keyword.There should be one internal link to a page on your blog and you should have one image with an alt tag that has your keyword….wait there’s even more

Thanks for the handy free tips. However, you should probably stop recommending the usage of “bold” and “italics” since those are deprecated, and use “strong” and “emphasis” instead. Oh wait, there’s even more? Goodie!

Now what if i told you there was a simple WordPress plugin that does all the On-Page SEO, and automatically for you? That’s right AUTOMATICALLY, just watch this 4minute video for more information at the website of some dickhole who believes, despite my frequent claims otherwise, that I actually want to draw traffic to this page, and whose page I will not ever link, and whose spammed comments I will never approve.

If you told me all that, I still wouldn’t care. Nor would I approve your comments. Nor would I link your website.

Ananutherthing!

Elitism pisses me off. I don’t think I made that sufficiently clear in my last post, so here is some clarification.

I think the world should have evolved us beyond this stupid tribal behaviour by now, but it happens everywhere. One guy’s group is “better” than everyone else for some arbitrary reason or another, and that person then seems to feel as though he has the right to act like a jerk to everyone else. I’ve seen this happen in a lot of areas in life – it’s not limited to one activity. That’s the crap part about it. It recognizes no boundaries.

Continue reading